It Almost Seems Like a Complete Thought

Almost and seems are two of my least favorite words. It’s almost as if I hate them. That may almost be what some would seem mean, but I almost don’t care. Every time I read those words it almost seems like I want to scream. And when it seems like almost every writer loves to flood their writing with these non-committal abominations, it seems like I should almost give up hope. Please be what seems like a considerate writer and almost never use those words.